The Amish Voice 12
What does it mean to be one flesh in marriage?
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Answer:
The term “one flesh” comes from
the Genesis account of the creation of Eve.
Genesis 2:21-24 describes the process by
which God created Eve from a rib taken from
Adam’s side as he slept.
Genesis 2:21-24
And the LORD God caused a deep sleep
to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he
took one of his ribs, and closed up the
flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which
the LORD God had taken from man,
made he a woman, and brought her
unto the man. And Adam said, This is
now bone of my bones, and flesh of my
flesh: she shall be called Woman, be-
cause she was taken out of Man.
There-
fore shall a man leave his father and
his mother, and shall cleave unto his
wife: and they shall be one flesh
.
Adam recognized that Eve was part of him—
they were in fact “one flesh.” The term “one
flesh” means that just as our bodies are one
whole entity and cannot be divided into piec-
es and still be a whole, so God intended it to
be with the marriage relationship. There are
no longer two entities (two individuals), but
now there is one entity (a married couple).
There are a number of aspects to this new
union.
As far as emotional attachments are con-
cerned, the new unit takes precedence over
all previous and future relationships (Genesis
2:24). Some marriage partners continue to
place greater weight upon ties with parents
than with the new partner. This is a recipe for
disaster in the marriage and is a perversion of
God’s original intention of “leaving and
cleaving.” A similar problem can develop
when a spouse begins to draw closer to a
child to meet emotional needs rather than to
his or her partner.
Emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, finan-
cially, and in every other way, the couple is
to become one. Even as one part of the body
cares for the other body parts (the stomach
digests food for the body, the brain directs
the body for the good of the whole, the hands
work for the sake of the body, etc.), so each
partner in the marriage is to care for the oth-
er. Each partner is no longer to see money
earned as “my” money; but rather as “our”
money. Ephesians 5:22-33 and Proverbs
31:10-31 give the application of this
“oneness” to the role of the husband and to
the wife, respectively.
Physically, they become one flesh, and the
result of that one flesh is found in the chil-
dren that their union produces; these children
now possess a special genetic makeup, spe-
cific to their union. Even in the sexual aspect
of their relationship, a husband and wife are
not to consider their bodies as their own but
as belonging to their partner (1 Corinthians
7:3-5). Nor are they to focus on their own
pleasure but rather the giving of pleasure to
their spouse.
1 Corinthians 7:3-5
Let the husband render unto the wife
due benevolence: and likewise also the
wife unto the husband. The wife hath
not power of her own body, but the hus-
band: and likewise also the husband
hath not power of his own body, but the
wife. Defraud ye not one the other, ex-
cept it be with consent for a time, that
ye may give yourselves to fasting and
prayer; and come together again, that
Satan tempt you not for your inconti-
nency.
This oneness and desire to benefit each other
is not automatic, especially after mankind’s
fall into sin. The man, in Genesis 2:24, is
told to “cleave” to his wife. This word has
two ideas behind it. One is to be “glued” to
his wife, a picture of how tight the marriage
bond is to be. The other aspect is to “pursue
hard after” the wife. This “pursuing hard
after” is to go beyond the courtship leading
—Continued on Page 11—
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