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The Amish Voice 9
Since writing
To Kill a Lion: Destroying the Power of Lust from the
Root,
I have come to the conclusion that many sexual problems exist
because people do not understand the blessing of their sexuality and
therefore they fall into sexual bondage and guilt. So what do I mean?
Many people are led to believe that something is wrong with them
because they are tempted sexually. What they really believe is that
their sexuality is part of the “flesh” and therefore bad. This couldn’t
be farther from the truth. In my seminar called
Sexuality and Intima-
cy in Marriage,
I begin with teaching participants from the Bible that
sex is good,
that it was created by God as a blessing. It is a strong,
positive, motivational force.
Here is where we must begin—accepting and enjoying that God made
us sexual beings! But we must also realize that Satan always counter-
feits the things of God. Sex was designed by God to be enjoyed by a
man and woman who are married to each other.
Several years ago, I performed a wedding ceremony of two young
people. They asked me to give them their final marriage counseling
talk at the wedding in front of their guests. In my talk to them, I men-
tioned that part of a healthy marriage is having a healthy sexual life. I
said that sex for married couples is a “celebration “of their oneness
with each other. I told them that even though many people neglect
this area, they must not! I also told them that “modesty” in marriage
is not appropriate. God said that Adam and Eve were “naked and not
ashamed.” (The word “ashamed” means “modest.”)
Afterwards I had the best and worst reactions to a message I ever got
at a wedding. The good came from those who understood the bless-
ing of sex to a marriage couple, but the bad came from those who
somehow learned that sex was bad or inappropriate to talk about pub-
licly. My answer to that is that the reason we have so many people in
sexual bondage and guilt is because we don’t teach the Godliness of
sex, and the evil of Satan’s counterfeit, so therefore people are con-
fused and express their sexual feelings in immoral ways.
Often people think that sex is bad because they have been sexually
abused. Sexual abuse is one of the most damaging acts on earth to a
person’s life and heart. Healthy sex flourishes ONLY in an environ-
ment of love, humility, sensitivity and understanding.
If you have felt guilty for being sexual, stop now and thank God that
healthy people are sexual people, but also ask God to bring your sex-
ual desires under His control so that He can be glorified in all you do.
Sex in Marriage is Good
— by Bruce Lengeman, author of “To Kill a Lion”
Commitment
To Kill a Lion
Destroying the Power of Lust From the Root
This is a new book by Bruce Lengeman designed to
help men find the roots of their sexual addiction. The
theme is “Men cry out, I know it is wrong, but why
can’t I stop!” The book is for both counselors and
strugglers.
To Kill a Lion
will help men understand
their own sexuality, and what makes it operate “out
of alignment” with God’s design. You’ll learn why it
is healthy to be sexual as a man, but in a pure and
Godly way. Though this book was not written for
women, many are reading it and getting understand-
ing of things they never knew about sexuality.
To order, either call the MAP ministry at (419) 962-1515 or mail a
check to “The Amish Voice, PO Box 128, Savannah OH 44874
The price of the book is $17 discounted to $15 (includes S&H)
Commitment is a word
packed with meaning. I
used to think I understood
the meaning of this word
when I married my hus-
band. But in time, I realize
that commitment doesn't end
when it requires something from
us. Neither does it end when our
spouse does something we don't like.
It doesn't even end when they hurt us. And it
doesn't end when we are misunderstood. In
fact, sometimes it calls for great sacrifice.
Recently, I needed to give something up that
was very dear to my heart and it had to do
with something that came up between my
husband and I.
I am not saying that our husbands should not
be sensitive to our needs and wants, likes and
dislikes, dreams and goals, but when some-
thing is consistently happening between two
people, it is time to give that something to
God. It may only be a short term sacrifice.
Sometimes when we
yield, our spouse may
realize they are more
important than that
thing, and not feel so
threatened by it, or it
may be a situation that
changes and is not an issue in
the future.
Sometimes when we yield something
to the Lord's control, He rewards us by giv-
ing it back.
Sometimes He gives us something better.
When God requires us to give something up,
we don't always know whether we will get it
back, however, God promises us that the
water He gives us will quench our thirst. We
can rest in that promise, and know that any-
thing God gives us is the real deal and will
satisfy us more than anything the world or
our flesh has to offer. Oh I know, it can
sometimes be hard to see past our flesh and
desires. Some things are not easy to give up.
Among those are relationships or addictions.
The thing I needed to give up for my hus-
band was a relationship. I am struggling with
resentment that I need to give up a perfectly
good friendship just because it makes him
feel insecure. This really hurts and feels un-
fair. But the question at hand: is it worth it to
hang onto something that compromises our
relationship?
To whom did I commit my life? The answer
is, my husband. And that is what matters. I
do not have the promise of ever being able to
communicate with this person again. But I do
have good memories, and I know that we are
still friends even though we are not an active
part of each other's lives. And though I feel
sad right now, I have joy and peace because I
know I made the right decision.
Commitment—the choice to be faithful to
keep a promise, no matter what the cost may
be. My husband is worth that commitment.
-by Lyn Miller
Sin will take you further
than you want to go!
Keep you longer
than you want to stay!
Charge you more
than you want to pay!