All I Need
By Anna Schrock
September 1, 2016
I am sitting here in bed miserable. My mouth and ear are in pain from a toothache that won't go away after three days. I finally couldn’t take it anymore, and tonight I broke down. The funny thing is, the pain is not the only reason for my breakdown.
You may ask yourself, "Okay, why is she getting so personal?” I would encourage you to hold on for a bit. I have something important to say. I will try to put it into words.
God is good. I've been caught up in so much, and I’ve been trying to understand so much that my head sometimes feels like a murky mud puddle too dense to make sense of anything. There are so many different viewpoints presented to me as well as different opinions, beliefs, dress codes, and more. In the middle of it all, I have been presented with an impossible situation with seemingly impossible decisions threatening to drive me mad (I may possibly have created a mountain out of a mole hill, but to me, it is that bad).
My faith has been tested to the maximum degree. I have tried so hard to find realistic and factual explanations for everything in my life. I realize that there are answers to my questions; however, the only way to know ALL of the answers ALL of the time is to know everything there is to know, which is, of course, impossible.
Tonight, I accept the fact that my brain is too small to know everything, so I will simply trust in the One who does know everything. When God's ways don't make sense to me, I know—I KNOW, it is simply due to my limited intelligence. How do I know this to be true? From experience. A tiny little *plink* of truthful knowledge dropped into my head would be enough, time and time again, to dissolve my sincere accusations. In the end, I would simply always respond with: "Oh...........ok."
This is where I'm at right now at 12:18 a.m., sitting here physically uncomfortable. I am sure of one thing from the very core of my being: God is a good God. He is holy and just in every way. I look at everybody. I look at myself. There is always some form of disappointment because we're not perfect; but as I look at God, I see that He is perfect. He is good, through and through. There is no smudge, no shameful imperfection, nothing but pureness and goodness. This is the kind of God I am able to trust with my soul, my family, and my life. This is the God I worship in spirit and in truth (John 4:24). This is the God I will follow through the twists and turns in the maze of life, which has so many fine lines that are hard to distinguish.
I don't need all the answers. I don't need to be able to point at a group of professing Christians and tell myself which one is right and which one is wrong. I only need God, and I only need to worship Him in spirit and in truth. He will then show me the truth I need to know. I could go on forever with more things I have learned, but this is already too long, and I'd get off subject, so I will leave you with this verse:
O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever. Psalm 136:1
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