John Schwartz
By John Schwartz
August 19, 2014
My name is John Schwartz, and I grew up in the Old Order Amish culture. There were definitely some things about the Amish culture that I loved and am glad that I got to experience. I loved the closeness shared between my family and my friends, and I enjoyed being the oldest child of a large family of ten. I also appreciated all of the hours spent outside working on the family farm. Many good memories were made during that early portion of my life.
Right around the time of my 18th birthday in 1959, however, I realized that I would soon be pressured into joining the Amish church. I couldn’t bring myself around to accept the idea of joining the church because I didn’t believe in the church, and I would have considered myself a “hypocrite” for joining something I didn’t 100% stand behind.
Therefore, one day, I left a note on my bedroom dresser and left the Amish in secret. I felt at the time that I had no choice but to leave in such a secretive fashion, but later in the day, I felt guilty and decided to return for a little bit to face everyone and try to leave with a proper goodbye. This decision was a bad one and didn’t end well; it was very devastating for my family to see me go.
After I left my family that day, I faced many difficulties in life I didn’t necessarily expect along the way. The main thing I experienced was extreme loneliness. Being cast out of my family was difficult and very painful since we were very close. It has been over fifty-five years since the day that I left home, and it is still as painful today as it was when I was young.
It also took me roughly five years to adapt to the new culture in the “English” world. After five years, it seemed to become easier because of comradery with some fellow employees and friends, but my family remained and still is very strict against me. I have very limited contact except for one brother who is an Old Order Amish bishop; He and I have a secret relationship in which we communicate regularly via letters.
Although leaving the Amish was a difficult experience for me, I knew I had no other choice because of my conscience. I couldn’t deny God then just as I can’t deny Him today. God was with me from day one of my life it seems. I saw through the Old Order Amish hypocrisy from early childhood when my parents would ride in a car, but told me that I would go to hell if I ever drove one. One thing stacked upon others separated me in spirit from my parents and siblings.
I feel now that God chose me out of the flock so that I can and must evangelize to my very own family. I use every available opportunity to represent Jesus to my family and feel God is using me to make His case for Salvation to them. When they tell me that my only hope of salvation is to come back to the Old Order Amish Church and make things right with the church, I then have an open door to introduce them to "Jesus' Church." In fact, one of my maternal brothers is now knocking on Jesus' door. Jesus is working His way into his heart.
I am thankful for all God has done in my life. I'm a senior now and most of my life is behind me, but I still have the best of all worlds in front of me. My salvation is secure. Praise God!
This testimony has been published with permission from the owner.
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